A glance to the left and we can see the action unfolding; the stars of this year's panto spectacular at Milton Keynes Theatre have a captive audience, and the laughter says that this performance – the fourth in a run of 62 - is a winner.
On stage it is mayhem of course, albeit intentional.
But we are viewing Aladdin away from the bright stage lights, tucked away in the wings, and in our dark corner there are more comings and goings than we can keep track of. It's controlled mayhem back here too.
It turns out that penguins are like buses; you don't see one in ages, and then four arrive in one go – and these beaky birds shuffle on stage for a fleeting appearance alongside star of the show Joe Pasquale (starring as Wishee Washee) and David Robbins' Widow Twankey.
It is a brilliantly random moment in a production that has lots of those. That's the thing with panto; you really don't know what will happen next – although we have been warned to keep an eye out for a fast moving toilet, which will head our way at some point during Act 1!
If you are among the estimated ?? who will take a pew for a performance before Aladdin takes his final ride on the magic carpet, you'll be wowed by the terrific amount of special effects in this dazzling Qdos production, and they really are sensational.
We're not about to spill the beans and ruin the surprises for you, but we do know that a whole lot of work goes into creating the onstage magic.
Preparation and timing is key in this show. What if Kevin (?) the flea isn't ready to make a splash? What if Aladdin's boxing gloves go missing before use? And heaven forbid the magic lamp gets misplaced!
Prop management is one thing, but this show has more costume changes than most too – and it's not always an easy thing to do, swapping one garment for another in the darkness, especially for Widow Twankey, whose exquisite outfits are hardly the sort of thing you just 'slip into!'
But let's not forget the ensemble, who are racing around like busy bees. And that's not the only time bees get a mention in this show. Special mention to Kostas Alexo whose hard work backstage results in one of those wow-factors we mentioned.
It mightn't be quite back breaking stuff that he gets up to, but it's not far off!
All the time, backstage creatives are on the go; arranging staging, scene setting, and moving some seriously impressive bits of kit.
“Do you think it's coming together now?” Lee asks, during one of his fleeting off-stage visits, and absolutely it is.
Ooh, here comes that toilet on wheels, which thankfully stops short of colliding with me.
Actually, it does seems a little bit full of itself. A touch of ego maybe? Or could it be flush with success?!
There are no other egos on display though, just a real sense of panto family, and when dashing from one scene to prepare for the next, Lee and Joe race past me still giggling, like schoolboys up to mischief.
When a couple of pearls escape from a prop and roll across the floor at speed they are quickly stopped by Princess Jasmine, who gives a quick swish of her dress and retrieves them before anyone need worry about skidding on the runaway jewels.
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We must make special mention of the youngsters from Dancebox Studios (who do a great turn as Babes in the show, and are all local girls), the fierce fabulousness of The Empress (Debra Michaels is perfect) and Sarah Earnshaw as Scherazade, Slave of the Ring.
If you think that's a mouthful to say, you're not alone – Aladdin calls her Shirley for short!
Abanazar is a brilliant baddie (played by Phil Corbitt) and the audience's boos seep into the wings whenever he takes the stage. If you think he seems menacing under the lights, it is much worse when you seem him in close proximity by dark light. Eek!
This panto is bursting with silly moments – and a wonderfully well choreographed song featuring Aladdin, Wishee Washee, The Empress and Widow Twankey is one of them. We sat through the scene three times in the opening week, and dissolved into a giggling mess on each occasion.
There are some BIG surprises in Aladdin, and a cast and crew working their socks off to give you a magical treat. You're in safe hands; Joe is a panto king with more than three decades at the helm of seasonal shows, and in Lee he has a perfect panto partner.
The laughter is contagious. Luckily, the gags about bottom burps and the water spitting isn't!
We love panto, and seeing it from the 'dark side' allows a whole new appreciation for those who make the magic happen twice daily for seven weeks.
As the curtain comes down, the cast catch a collective breath, ditch their fancy attire and head out into the chilly new city air for a break and a bite to eat.
In a few hours they'll be back at the theatre, ready to start the second performance of the day, by lamplight, naturally.
Aladdin is the panto that flies high, but remember, it's not just for Christmas.
Performances continue until next Sunday (January 12, 2020).
Visit atgtickets.com/miltonkeynes to put some cheer into your new year.
