With Despicable Me 3 (2017) and Cars 3 (2017) arriving in cinemas, I thought it was be a great opportunity to bring up one of my biggest annoyances at the cinema; unruly behaviour of children and their nonchalant parents.
When I go see a U certificate film, I always try to strategise the showing I go see, writes Claire Durrant.
I stay away from weekends and aim to see one before school finishes during the week. So when I went to go see Cars 3 during a Monday afternoon, I assumed it would all be okay.
There my boyfriend and I sat waiting for the adverts to start, when a woman with a small child and a sleeping newborn in a pram turned up. Behind them another family with a small boy came up the stairs and sat directly behind us. The mother turned to her offspring and asked if he was excited to watch a film on the "big TV" for the first time.
He hadn't been to the cinema before...great.
That means one of the two possibilities will occur. One - when the lights turn off and the loud film starts, he will get scared and cry. Two - around thirty minutes or so in to the film, he will become bored and frustrated, crying will also ensue.
It was the latter. Whereas sane parents will remove their burden from the screening to try and calm them, these parents decided it was okay to let their rugrat stomp across the aisle and near the stairs.
When they managed to coerce the child back to his seat, (the oxymoron of their loud whispering and the boy's moaning had received many dirty looks from other people at this point) the child decided to stand up and poke his head down towards the seat in front of him.
Who was sitting in front of him? I was of course. The kid coughed and I felt his phlegm and spit actually touch my shoulder. I turned around and the mother didn't even apologise, let alone look me in the eye.
Remember that sleeping newborn?
Well it was at this point that the baby woke up and started wailing. Did its Mum wheel it out as to not disturb everyone else's enjoyment?
No, that would be the unselfish thing to do. Instead she felt it was best to just let the baby stop crying on its own accord.
It finally stopped when the film had finished.
Just because a U certificate is said to be "suitable for everyone," does not mean it is in fact suitable for everyone.
Just because it's an animated film does not give a parent the right to let their child act however they want. People of all ages enjoy Disney, Pixar and other animated company's films. In most cases these films are more suited to adults than they are to two/three year olds.
At least adults can comprehend what they are watching.
When you become a parent, it is your responsibility to know when your child is ready to go to the cinema. There is a difference between your toddler sitting through an hour of CBeebies at home, and sitting through a film in a dark room at the cinema.
Unfortunately there is no exact age a child magically becomes ready. I've been to see films and shows at the theatre where children as young as four can behave perfect, and children around eight can become disruptive. I will stress however, that if your newborn is in a pram, and does not have the strength to sit up on its on own and actually watch the film, it is 100% too young to be there!
Thankfully Cineworld does this amazing thing called Cinebabies (Odeon does something similar), with special showings of appropriate films that are encouraged to be watched by families with small children as a trial. If your child is fully engrossed and quiet during the film, then congratulations, you've passed.
If your child is overwhelmed (or underwhelmed), you remove them from the screening.
Take them to the toilet and calm them down.
Or realise that you can't force your child to enjoy themselves, and it's not fair to ruin everyone else's film experience, so it's best to take them home.
It's okay if they're not ready yet, try again another time.
